tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8189321271545893193.post1929537131111012633..comments2023-06-30T16:07:17.325+01:00Comments on What now?: HarvestingJ-in-Waleshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02390582364341730481noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8189321271545893193.post-59230904142008631392010-10-29T00:37:28.024+01:002010-10-29T00:37:28.024+01:00Thank you everyone. I was feeling unreasonably dis...Thank you everyone. I was feeling unreasonably distressed about this - I don't know why. Perhaps, as Megan says, it was something else in which I failed R after he had made his wishes so clear.<br />But there isn't enough time to assimilate all the feelings at the time. Or perhaps the immediate gut reaction is the right one. Two and a quarter years later I can't see I would do anything different, so perhaps it was the right thing to do.<br />Oh bugger it. Will this poxy guilt business ever go away?J-in-Waleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02390582364341730481noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8189321271545893193.post-29260146695609254542010-10-20T19:58:02.974+01:002010-10-20T19:58:02.974+01:00I ahve felt so horribly that I didn't have mat...I ahve felt so horribly that I didn't have matt's organs or anything donated. I didn't even think about it until several days later. Good lord, why would I? He was just here a minute ago.... But no one at the scene brought it up. Reading your post, I think now that maybe because he was gone when they found him, it was't even an option. Man. I still both feel horribly, and also thankful, in a way, that they didn't ask. I feel like I failed matt's wishes, and at the same time - <br /><br />Everything becomes gray, I think. So many things I felt strongly about, Matt felt strongly about - when the time smacks into you, it's just not the same. Maybe if there was adjustment time - I mean, like a long adjustment time. Not this here's-a-shock-now-make-a-decision-thing. Each of us has to make a decision in these moments from our own truth and our own in-that-moment experience. In my opinion/experience, all prior understanding of the world is no longer relevant in that moment. I also feel (and trying to make myself feel better too) that our loves would want, most of all, for us to follow OUR truth in that moment, rather than try to follow their wishes.meganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10064483599165161879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8189321271545893193.post-28050147496430424662010-10-20T10:43:02.583+01:002010-10-20T10:43:02.583+01:00I had NO idea that's how it happened. Oh no n...I had NO idea that's how it happened. Oh no no no no no. No way. No wonder you didn't.<br /><br />I couldn't have either. Not even if hell froze over. No. No. No.<br /><br />oh lord what a thought ... it really isn't as simple as they'd have us believe!<br /><br />Love and hugs<br />xxxBoohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10695496303699631884noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8189321271545893193.post-85484918662731016202010-10-20T02:24:04.854+01:002010-10-20T02:24:04.854+01:00you made the decision that was right for you. on ...you made the decision that was right for you. on a personal note, i agree with you. i could not have faced doing that, and as fate would have it, it did not come up for me. i feel that R. would have agreed with your decision since you would be the one having to face the long-term memories of it.<br /><br />i pray you have peace.abandonedsoulshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06020499806998154330noreply@blogger.com